I usually say I don’t drink, but that’s not strictly true. Drinking makes me feel guilty, and I don’t really like myself when I’m drunk, so not drinking is just easier than feeling awful.
I also have a history of making very bad decisions. Not just ordinary bad decisions, but spectacularly dangerous things where I’m really fortunate not to have suffered worse consequences than I did. I went through a self destructive phase, and I drank to prove to anyone paying attention that I was in charge of my actions, and it sort of got away from me. I was a victim of alcoholism, but it was someone else’s disease, not mine. I was collateral damage.
These days, I’ll have a pint or two if I’m with friends who I know won’t judge me, and sometimes, I don’t feel terrible about it.
If I’m with people who don’t know me well and don’t know my sordid history, it’s easier just to say I don’t drink than to fully explain it.
